A Journey into Self-Love · Uncategorized

5 Ways to Add a Little Bit of Glamour to our Lives.

Hello, friends! I hope that you are having a lovely Friday thus far! It is FINALLY the weekend! This week was seemingly never ending, oh my goodness.

We may not have the time or the money to live quite as glamoursly as we’d like to, but there are many small things we can do to glam up our everyday life. I wanted to write a blog post dedicated to this!

1.Personal Grooming. Its about impossible for me to feel even remotely glamorous if I’m unkept. Some of the things I do in terms of grooming are: showering, shaving, moisturizing, clipping my nails, painting my nails, plucking my eyebrows, and making sure my face is clean and free of leftover makeup.

2. Hair. On a day-to-day basis, I brush my hair and go, but this blog post is not about that, it’s about adding glamour to our lives. So, I will generally put my hair in curlers if I’m feeling extra fancy. It’s great because you can put your curlers in your wet hair, do everything else on your list and when you take them out, BAM, beautiful movie starlet hair.

3. Makeup. Once again, I do not wear makeup every single day. This makes it all the more special when I do. You can add a little extra oomph to your look by adding a some thicker eyeliner, a brighter lipstick, or maybe a glitter eyeshadow.

4. Smelly smells. I recommend some yummy smelling lotion for your moisturizing, but make sure it’s not breaking you out! From someone with very sensitive skin, there’s nothing that feels less glamorous than breaking out or getting rashes from your lotion. Another thing in this category is perfume. I think that perfume is worth a little splurge. I don’t use mine every day, so that when I do, I feel extra glamorous and put together.

5. Clothes. Everybody has different clothing items they feel the most confident in. Heck, even a pair of matching jammies could work. The most important things for clothing would be what makes you feel confident and what makes you feel comfortable. You could be wearing a dress that costs hundreds of dollars, but if it didn’t fit right, you’d still feel uncomfortable in it. You could just as easily feel your best in a dress from Goodwill that cost $5.00. Glamour truly comes from within, but sometimes the physical things help it manifest itself.

Thank you so much for reading, friends! I hope that you enjoyed this post. I know it’s a little different than what I usually post, but I enjoyed writing it all the same! 🙂

XOXO,

Mattie Mae

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Musings

Why We Need to Stop Romanticizing Being Perpetually Busy.

Hi, friends! I hope that y’all are doing well. Today’s blog post is a little different, I suppose. I don’t really know where I want to end up with it, but I’ll start here: I don’t think it’s healthy for anybody to be busy all the time. But it’s something that we seem to treat positively, as though it’s admirable or something to strive for. I think it’s admirable, but I don’t think it’s something to strive for. I applaud every hard-worker out there, and respect them endlessly, I just worry about society forcing busyness onto people.

I think that it’s so profoundly sad that we live in a world where we feel the need to always be busy. I know it’s something that I struggle with. I began to make it part of my identity. I would, in a very strange way, brag about always being busy, as if it made me worth more than I would if I was busy a healthy amount. I think we’re too focused on moving forward, moving forward, moving forward. We seldom let ourselves just be.

I feel as though there are going to be some people that disagree with me on this, and that’s okay. I just really feel like I needed to speak my opinion on the matter. We’re only human, we need time to recharge. I used to work and/or go to class every single day, week after week, month after month. I was miserable. I didn’t have any time to charge, but I would still brag about it, in the strangest sort of way. I don’t know why. Maybe I thought people would think I was a better person, somehow? That’s probably what it was. Which still makes no sense.

Sunday’s are supposed to be a day of relaxation and reflection, but how often do they turn into a day where you try to get your whole entire life together? For me, it’s more often than not. I make myself lists, long, long lists, that are absolutely impossible to finish in a day. I’ve been trying so hard not to do this anymore. Lately, I have been making a list of five things per day. Generally, it has one or two schoolwork things that HAVE to get done, a household chore, and then a couple self-care activities. An example would be:

To-Do List

1.Turn in annotated bibliography.

2. Do dishes.

3.Take meds.

4.Take shower.

5.Post blog.

I think it’s important to have some items on the list that are fairly simple, so that you can feel some accomplishment in your day. Before, I was putting so much difficult stuff on my lists that I would go days without being able to check anything off. And let me tell you, it’s not going to motivate you whatsoever.

Finding the balance is so dang hard, and I’m still trying to find a balance in my life. It’s very hard to do, but I suppose it’s something that we all just need to keep working on. We must continue (or start) listening to our bodies and our minds, so that we know what we’re capable of. And it’s extra important to be honest with yourself about this. Whether it be realizing that you need to do more work, or whether it be you realizing you need to do less work. Everyone is different and we need to accept this. The amount we can get done in a day is different. I’ve always been pretty slow and things take me so long to do. I move at a slow pace and therefore get things done at a slower pace. But hey, they’re still getting done, right?

We need to quit worrying so much about what we should be able to do, and instead, focus on what it is that we can do.

Thank you so much for reading, friends. I appreciate the fact that I can send my words out on the internet and they can reach so many people. Much more effective than a message in a bottle. Although not quite as cool, I must admit.

XOXO,

Mattie Mae

Musings

Dealing with Uncertainty.

Hi, friends! Hope your week is going well so far! My Monday is wonderful because I’m having my first snow day of my whole college career!  So, I’m spending the day with my friend Rosie, watching Fixer upper and doing face masks. I definitely cannot complain!

I felt compelled to write this post because (weather permitting) I have an advising appointment tomorrow to officially change my major. This will be my third major. Initially, I was an elementary education major, then I was a creative writing major, and now I’m planning on being a child development major with an English minor.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the insane pressure that’s put on young people to find their forever career. My brother is about to start college and is understandably quite nervous. I remember being a freshman in college and thinking that I was 100% positive about what I would do for the rest of my life. And how quickly I realized how clueless I was. It made me feel terrible about myself. I felt like I was never going to find something that I was good at or something that I liked. And sometimes, I still feel like that. College is a scary time in your life, and it’s normal to feel a little uncertain about things.

I told my brother that it’s alright to not know what he’s going to do after college, never mind his whole life. Heck, it’s okay to not know what he’s doing in the next year. Some people may be able to pick a major and stick with it the whole 4+ years, but most have a slightly more difficult time. Uncertainty is to be expected when in college, and it isn’t something that you should feel ashamed of.

That being said, uncertainty is something that extends far past college. Life is so unpredictable, and as much as we try to plan out our entire lives, we never know exactly what the future holds. Which only solidifies the idea that it’s okay to not know what direction your life is going. It’s important to have faith that you’ll end up where you need to be. You’ll figure it out one day. And until then, just do your best.

Thank you so much for reading!

XOXO,

Mattie Mae

Cleaning Chronicles

Cleaning Chronicles: Cleaning Out Your Closet

Hi, y’all! I have a confession that probably isn’t too surprising, especially if you know me — I love shopping and I love clothes. That being said, my apartment is very small and I have no room whatsoever for all of the clothes that I have. Also, I don’t wear hardly any of the clothes I own. Let’s just say that I’ve had a couple questionable fashion stages… I’ve decided that it is FINALLY time to do some decluttering.

I have a fairly large closet, but it’s certainly not big enough for all my clothes. I have a shelf in there, multiple baskets, tons of those big tubs that people use to store Christmas decorations, and then I have all my dirty clothes in hampers. Maybe my boyfriend was right when he said I had too many clothes…

The first thing that should be done is to wash all of your clothes. That makes it easier to know what all you have, so that you have a simpler time getting rid of things. Note to self: this is helpful so you don’t end up having fifteen of the same plain black t-shirts.  I am one of those people who isn’t the best at doing laundry when I need to, so this is usually half the struggle.

The next hurdle is to get rid of the clothes that are too small or too big for you. Don’t beat yourself up about not being able to fit into the clothes that you wore when you were fourteen. I’m only now starting to be a little better at this. It can be kind of rough getting rid of them, but I find that it’s even rougher to look at them in your closet every day. There’s no reason to keep clothes that only serve as a reminder of what your body used to be like. Nor should your closet represent how you want your body to look. I think both of those things are so detrimental to one’s self-image. As usual, it’s easier said than done, but it’s a good first step.

After you’ve gotten rid of the clothes that don’t fit, move on to clothes that you don’t find yourself wearing. This is where I have the most trouble. I never wear the t-shirts of bands I listened to in middle school, but I still have them all. There’s no situation other than homecoming that I would need uber-fancy dresses for, but it took me years and years to get rid of all my homecoming dresses. It’s important to get rid of clothes that you don’t wear because they’re adding clutter to your house and to your life. I find that when I have a messy house, I also have a messy mind.

Now the question remains: What to do with these clothes once you’ve decided to get rid of them?

  1. Donate them! There are so many people in the world that could benefit from your clothes! Especially schools. You can get in touch with a teacher that you know and ask if they could use any clothes to give to students. Odds are, they will say yes!
  2. Have a yard sale! A great way to get rid of clutter AND make money.
  3. Have a clothing swap with friends! This is probably one of my favorites. It’s a great way to add new pieces to your wardrobe without spending a dime. It’s especially great if you and your friends have different styles, because you can experiment with your look without spending any money. Your friends will love it too!
  4. Sell it on social media or a shopping app!Another cool thing that you can do is to sell your cloths on your Facebook or your Instagram. It’s great because it’s far less work than a garage sale, especially if the person who wants to buy it lives in the area and you can just drop it off at their home. I’m just now starting to sell clothes on Poshmark! I haven’t sold anything yet, but to be fair, I only have one item listed. My username is @midwestmattie if you want to check it out! This one seems pretty simple so far, all you really have to do is take pictures and add the descriptions of your items then you just need to wait!
  5. Last but not least, re-purpose your clothes!  You can take old dresses and turn them into shirts, rip old t-shirts into rags, turn jean jackets into jean vests… the possibilities are endless! It’s always fun to revamp your clothes so that they feel like new, or use them for a whole new purpose!

I’m hoping that writing this post will help me get my butt in gear and finish cleaning my closet! I need to be held accountable! I would post a picture of what my closet looked like before, but I don’t want to scare y’all.

Have a great day!!

XOXO,

Mattie Mae

Musings

5 Tips for Staying Happy in the Winter

Hi, friends! I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve written a post, although I don’t think that it’s actually been thaaaat long. I’m finally finished with exams! Yay! My first semester of my junior year of college is over with! I am SO happy about it. But y’all, if I’m being real with you, the fall semester is always really hard on me because once  winter hits I get sad like no other. I’ve slowly but surely  been finding ways to not let it get me so down.

  1. I know when it’s so dang cold out, all you want to do is cuddle up and hole up in your house for the day (or for days and days and days) but it’s SO important to get outside and get some exercise. Now listen, I’m not saying to go outside in the middle of the blizzard or when it’s -20 out. What I’m saying is that when you’re inside for so long, you may get cabin fever without even noticing it. I grumble and groan at myself when I decide to go for a walk in the winter, but once I’m out there I feel so invigorated and happy. Bonus if your town puts pretty Christmas decorations downtown that you can admire.
  2.  This is one that I’ve realized sort of recently. And boy, does it pain me. But here it is: comfort food only comforts you for so long. I’ve been eating like complete garbage lately, almost forgetting what fruits and vegetables are, and I really think it’s bringing my mood down. It’s making me feel all sorts of lethargic, which is already something that I’m dealing with come wintertime. I will keep you updated if I find any food that gives me some energy during these cold months.
  3. This may just be me, but the kind of lighting a room has changes my mood so much, be it positive, or be it negative. I remember living in the dorms and feeling so sad because the lights in my room reminded me of a doctor’s office. We can’t always change the kind of overhead lights we have, but my favorite thing to do is to put Christmas lights all over the house and use those instead. Or lamps! When I was a kid, my mom used to call our overhead lights our “mean” lights, and our little lamps our “nice” lights, which I still find to be true to this day.
  4. Now this one may be the hardest pill to swallow. It’s something that I never would have even thought of had my therapist told me it. It’s to not hang out in your bed unless you are actively trying to sleep. If you lie around in your bed all day your body gets used to it and it will make it harder for you to go to sleep.  Now who doesn’t love being snuggled up in their bed??? This one was super hard for me, but now I just make myself a little nest on the couch and it’s ALMOST just as good.
  5. Last but not least, be easy on yourself! In the winter it’s so easy to get depressed and to get down on ourselves for not being as productive as we could be. That’s why it’s important for us to celebrate the tasks we are able to do. My last day of exams I was so exhausted that my goal for the night was to take a shower and to work on the scarf I was knitting. It’s important to remember that we are only human, and we can’t be performing 100% all the time. It’s just not realistic.

 

Do y’all have any tips? I would love to hear them! Have a great Saturday!

XOXO,

Mattie Mae

Musings

You Won’t be Good at Everything.

Hello, friends! I hope you are all doing well. Today I wanted to talk about comparing ourselves to others. I wish I could say that I don’t do it, but I do, all the time. And about the absolute silliest things.

For example, I’ve been going to yoga a lot lately. I absolutely love it and I always feel so refreshed afterwards. However, I find that I’m comparing myself to everyone else in the class. Is their downward facing dog better than mine? Who’s the most flexible person in class? Who looks the best in their yoga clothes? I try to talk to my brain like I would talk to a small child. I tell myself that none of this is a competition, none of it! That I’m missing the point of yoga and that I just need to focus on my breathing instead. It’s so easy to become fixated on these things and then to use them to feel bad about ourselves. I’ll obsessively start thinking things like, “Are they a better writer than me?”, “Is their makeup better than mine?”, and, “Wow, they’re so good at this, I should probably just quit.”

My mom always tells this story about me from when I was a child and I think it sums me up even as an adult. I must have been fairly small, maybe five or six. And one day, out of the blue, I just start bawling because “I’m not as smart as my mom is”. My mom had to explain to me that she was older than I was, that she had lived more life than I had, and that these things didn’t mean that I was dumb. I get so sad thinking about little Mattie feeling that and then I realize that big Mattie feels that too. Only now there are more people in my life that I can compare myself to. Which isn’t only unfair to me, but it’s also unfair to them. Sometimes, when we become unhappy with ourselves and we begin to focus on our perceptions of others, we can become resentful towards them, when really, they’ve done nothing wrong at all.

Okay, say someone is better than you at something. So what? There are so many different factors when it comes to these things. How long have they been doing said thing? Is it their passion in life? Is it your passion? How long have you been doing it? If these questions aren’t able to alleviate your stress, there are other thoughts that can help.

There are so many things that we will do in our lives. Some because we have to, some because we want to, and some because we think we’ll be good at them. Here’s the secret to it all — you won’t be good at everything you try. This may sound sort of pessimistic, but honestly, once you allow yourself to believe this, it’s really quite freeing.

When I was still in high school, I remember thinking that one bad grade was the end of the world. I’d bring my report card home, usually crying, and show my dad. He would then give me a hug and he would ask me if I had done my best. And honestly, sometimes the answer was yes, but sometimes the answer was no.

This may sound like such a simple thing, but I want to share a realization that I didn’t come upon until about a year ago. I realized that sometimes I didn’t try my hardest because I was scared that my hardest wasn’t going to be good enough. Instead, I found that sometimes I was doing a bad job on purpose. If I rushed myself to do a paper and then proceeded to get a bad grade, then that’s not an accurate reflection on my intelligence, right? As a child, I was quite smart and didn’t have to put very much effort into school. As you get to college, things definitely change. It doesn’t matter how smart you are, you have to put in effort. And sometimes, you will put in all your effort and you will get a grade you’re not proud of. And maybe somebody who put in half the effort that you did will get a much better grade than you will. That’s just how life is. It doesn’t say anything bad about you. Just ask yourself if you did your best, if you did, that’s great! That’s all you can do! If you know in your heart of hearts that it wasn’t your best work, that’s okay, too. There’s always a next time. And a time after that. And a time after that.

I guess, in my long-winded way, all I wanted to say is: don’t compare yourself to others! All you can do in life is your personal best. And sometimes, your personal best is different than it is at other times. Life is full of variables, never forget that.

Thank you so much for reading! If nobody has said this to you today: I am proud of you!

-Mattie Mae

Musings

Five Helpful Tips

Hi, y’all! I’m right smack in the middle of the semester and I’m wondering how the heck I got here! Didn’t the semester just start? Wasn’t I just going to fourth of July barbecues? No? Well, yikes! While this post is specifically focused on college life, I think that all these things can be applied to non-college life as well.

Here are things that are keeping me sane (somewhat) during the craziness that is the middle of the semester.

  1. First and foremost, take your meds! If you don’t take meds, you can skip this one, of course. But if like me, you take medication daily, take your meds! I have the hardest time remembering taking mine, but luckily, I have a couple tricks that help me remember.
    1. Set an alarm on your phone!
    2. Write a note in your planner to remind you.
    3. Write on a sticky note and place it somewhere visible. The mirror, your toothbrush, your pillow, etc.
    4. Have a friend or family help you remember! My boyfriend is so good about texting me reminders about taking my pills.

Taking your pills is such an important thing and continuing to take them will help your mind and body work the best  it can. Life gets hectic and we sometimes forget things, but remembering to take your medication is vital!

2. Stay hydrated! It’s easy to not drink as much water as you should. I definitely am still working on this.  I think the biggest help for me is to buy a large water bottle. The reusable kind. I have a Brita filter at home that purifies my tap water which I use to fill up my 48 oz water bottle. It’s great because since it’s so big I don’t have to refill it as often. I take it with me to campus everyday and it really does help me stay hydrated. It also helps me not use as many plastic water bottles which not only saves the Earth, but it also will save you so much money.

3. Coffee is not a meal — eat! I am all too guilty of drinking cup after cup after cup of coffee. Which usually results in me feeling jittery and sick to my stomach. It’s usually then I have to ask myself if I’ve had anything to eat, or if I’ve only had coffee. It’s important to fuel our bodies so that we can perform our best. As a busy college student, I totally understand that it’s hard to find time to eat. What I’ve found works the best is to pack a lunch or pack some snacks with you, put them in your purse and backpack, so that when you have a minute or so, you’ll be able to eat. This saves you time and money throughout the day.

4. Map out your week! I am a firm believer in planners, calendars, and to-do lists. If I could get a job making to-do lists, believe me, I would. What I try to do on Sunday night is plan out my entire week in my planner. I map out my classes, my work schedule, and any other activities that I have for the week. This way, I’m less stressed and have a better idea of what I need to prepare for.

5. Lists! Going along with #4, is to-do lists! After I’ve mapped out my week, I decide what I want to do each day. I wake up Monday morning and make a list of what I want to accomplish that day. It can contain homework, taking a shower, or even doing the dishes. I think it’s important to not let our real life things get abandoned, even if we are busy with work and/or school.  And gosh, is there any better feeling than checking off everything on your list? I think not.

I hope you find these tips helpful! I hope that you’re having a great day, thank you SO much for reading!